LOTR Christmas
Caroling 3 (To I Saw Three Ships)
I saw three friends go running by,
One sunny day, one sunny day,
I sawt three friends go running by
one sunny day in the morning!
And why were running these friends three?
One sunny day, one sunny day.
And why were running these friends three,
one sunny day in the morning?
They're chasing after Hobbits, wee,
One sunny day, one sunny day!
They're chasing after Hobbiits wee,
One sunny day in the morning.
- Doctor Gamgee
to the tune of "Bring a torch, Jeanette Isabela" by our favorite villian:
Bring the Precious, oh Master and Samwise!
Brings my ring, Come hurry and run!
You will find that her lady-ship's waiting
She has a trap, which I am baiting.
Ah, ah, Beautiful is the precious,
Ah, Ah, Beautiful is the ONE!
And, of course, Gandalf crooning the timeless Classic, Let it Snow!
Oh the Weather up here is frightful,
And the winds sound rather spiteful,
The Dwarf hall's not far below,
Let is Snow, let is snow, let is snow!
Well is doesn't show signs of stopping,
And above the elf is hopping,
So we will to Moria go:
Let is snow, let it snow, let is snow!
When we finally find the door,
We must say the right words to get in,
But the watcher is such a boor,
Hobbits should not, pebbles skim!
Well he brought down the trees behind us,
and the Balrog's fire blinds us,
So to Galadriel we go!
Let is snow, let it snow, let it snow!
to the tune of "Bring a torch, Jeanette Isabela" by our favorite villian:
Bring the Precious, oh Master and Samwise!
Brings my ring, Come hurry and run!
You will find that her lady-ship's waiting
She has a trap, which I am baiting.
Ah, ah, Beautiful is the precious,
Ah, Ah, Beautiful is the ONE!
- Doctor Gamgee
topAnd, of course, Gandalf crooning the timeless Classic, Let it Snow!
Oh the Weather up here is frightful,
And the winds sound rather spiteful,
The Dwarf hall's not far below,
Let is Snow, let is snow, let is snow!
Well is doesn't show signs of stopping,
And above the elf is hopping,
So we will to Moria go:
Let is snow, let it snow, let is snow!
When we finally find the door,
We must say the right words to get in,
But the watcher is such a boor,
Hobbits should not, pebbles skim!
Well he brought down the trees behind us,
and the Balrog's fire blinds us,
So to Galadriel we go!
Let is snow, let it snow, let it snow!
- Doctor Gamgee
He Came Upon a Midnight Clear
(To ' It Came Upon a Midnight Clear')
He came upon the midnight clear,
That glorious bird they send,
The eagle swooping near the earth,
To save his wizardly friend!
A friend was gained and gained again
From Gwaihir, by gracious flight!
For Isengard and mountains lay,
Well seen by eagles' sight.
Still through the cloven skies he came,
With giant wings unfurled,
And took the wizardly friend afloat,
O'er all the weary world;
Above, then down to Lorien,
Where grey would be dressed in white -
So even o'er the fate of Men,
The eagles kept their sight.
He Came Upon a Midnight Clear
(To ' It Came Upon a Midnight Clear')
He came upon the midnight clear,
That glorious bird they send,
The eagle swooping near the earth,
To save his wizardly friend!
A friend was gained and gained again
From Gwaihir, by gracious flight!
For Isengard and mountains lay,
Well seen by eagles' sight.
Still through the cloven skies he came,
With giant wings unfurled,
And took the wizardly friend afloat,
O'er all the weary world;
Above, then down to Lorien,
Where grey would be dressed in white -
So even o'er the fate of Men,
The eagles kept their sight.
- Primula
Middle Earth
(sung to the tune of Jingle Bells)
Balrog scare
Elrond’s hair
Gimli’s got an axe.
Hobbit holes and
Mean cave trolls,
Gimli’s taking hacks, Oh
Frodo’s ring,
Trouble brings
Aragorn to save
The War is won
And Mordor’s done.
The Shire, long may it wave!
Middle Earth
(sung to the tune of Jingle Bells)
Balrog scare
Elrond’s hair
Gimli’s got an axe.
Hobbit holes and
Mean cave trolls,
Gimli’s taking hacks, Oh
Frodo’s ring,
Trouble brings
Aragorn to save
The War is won
And Mordor’s done.
The Shire, long may it wave!
- Theoden
Have a Mossy Tossy Huorn
(To Have a Holly Jolly Christmas)
Have a mossy tossy Huorn,
It's the best revenge that's near,
Hold the fort and there'll be orcs
A-mulching, never fear.
Have a mossy tossy Huorn,
And when you walk in the woods
As a treat beneath your feet
For plant-food orcs are good.
Ho ho this orc-host foe
Lurks with roots a-weave,
Patiently waits for them
To run beneath the leaves.
Have a mossy tossy Huorn
For indeed the trees are near -
Oh bygolly have a mossy tossy Huorn
This year!
(To Have a Holly Jolly Christmas)
Have a mossy tossy Huorn,
It's the best revenge that's near,
Hold the fort and there'll be orcs
A-mulching, never fear.
Have a mossy tossy Huorn,
And when you walk in the woods
As a treat beneath your feet
For plant-food orcs are good.
Ho ho this orc-host foe
Lurks with roots a-weave,
Patiently waits for them
To run beneath the leaves.
Have a mossy tossy Huorn
For indeed the trees are near -
Oh bygolly have a mossy tossy Huorn
This year!
- Primula
The Twelve Days in Rohan
by Arthur, Belladonna, Daughter of Kings, Laiquendi, Lindorie, Primula, Silivern Ithildin and Strange Elf
On my first day in Rohan, a wizard gave to me,
A King who got unshrivel-y....
Twelve majestic Mearas
Eleven Grimas sulking,
Ten Dour Northmen
Nine Huorns stomping
Eight bows a singing
Seven Maids-a-fighting
Six Orc's a slaying
Five Shiniiiing Swords!
Four Weeping Widows
Three Wand'ring Hunters
Two Rohan Warriors,
and a King who got unshrivel-y.
top
Christmas
All I want for Christmas
Is an Elf named Legolas.
Nothing more and nothing less
will help me with the stress
I always feel at Christmas.
The Twelve Days in Rohan
by Arthur, Belladonna, Daughter of Kings, Laiquendi, Lindorie, Primula, Silivern Ithildin and Strange Elf
On my first day in Rohan, a wizard gave to me,
A King who got unshrivel-y....
Twelve majestic Mearas
Eleven Grimas sulking,
Ten Dour Northmen
Nine Huorns stomping
Eight bows a singing
Seven Maids-a-fighting
Six Orc's a slaying
Five Shiniiiing Swords!
Four Weeping Widows
Three Wand'ring Hunters
Two Rohan Warriors,
and a King who got unshrivel-y.
top
Christmas
All I want for Christmas
Is an Elf named Legolas.
Nothing more and nothing less
will help me with the stress
I always feel at Christmas.
- Silivren
Ithildin
O Legolas O, Legolas,
Your handosomness delights us.
O Legolas, O Legolas,
Your handsomness delights us.
You're eyes so blue, they are so bright;
They're blue when winter snow is white.
O, Legolas, O, Legolas,
Your handsomness delights us!
O Legolas O, Legolas,
Your handosomness delights us.
O Legolas, O Legolas,
Your handsomness delights us.
You're eyes so blue, they are so bright;
They're blue when winter snow is white.
O, Legolas, O, Legolas,
Your handsomness delights us!
- Strange Elf
It Came Upon March 25th
(It Came Upon a Midnight Clear)
It came upon March 25th
In that glorious tale of old
The destruction of that thing,
That evil ring of gold
Peace on the earth
Goodwill to Men
Now Aragorn’s the king
The earth in happy cheering sang
Because there is no Ring
And with the evil Sauron
The world has suffered long
He and his Ring have caused trouble
Three thousand years of wrong
The men at war with Orcs did hear
The hope that rumbling brings
O hush the noise, ye men of strife
Because there is no Ring
The Eagles through cloven skies come
With their wide wings unfurled
And carried unconscious hobbits far
O’er all the erupting world
And in Ithilien they stay
While Elves and men sing
Their songs of praise to hobbits two
Because there is no Ring
And lo! the days are hast’ning on
By Elrond seen of old
And with the ever-circling years
The time has come foretold
When all the Elves of Middle-earth
Shall Rings to white ships bring
The Three Elf Rings shall fade away
Because there is no Ring
It Came Upon March 25th
(It Came Upon a Midnight Clear)
It came upon March 25th
In that glorious tale of old
The destruction of that thing,
That evil ring of gold
Peace on the earth
Goodwill to Men
Now Aragorn’s the king
The earth in happy cheering sang
Because there is no Ring
And with the evil Sauron
The world has suffered long
He and his Ring have caused trouble
Three thousand years of wrong
The men at war with Orcs did hear
The hope that rumbling brings
O hush the noise, ye men of strife
Because there is no Ring
The Eagles through cloven skies come
With their wide wings unfurled
And carried unconscious hobbits far
O’er all the erupting world
And in Ithilien they stay
While Elves and men sing
Their songs of praise to hobbits two
Because there is no Ring
And lo! the days are hast’ning on
By Elrond seen of old
And with the ever-circling years
The time has come foretold
When all the Elves of Middle-earth
Shall Rings to white ships bring
The Three Elf Rings shall fade away
Because there is no Ring
- MerryK
Hark the Herald Tall Men Sing
(Hark the Herald Angels Sing)
Hark the herald tall men sing
Glory to our brand new king!
Peace in Middle-earth so mild
Beregond is reconciled
Joyful all the people cry!
Join the triumph of the skies!
With some Elvish folk to sing
Praises ‘cause there is no Ring!
With some Rohirrim to sing
Praises ‘cause there is no Ring!
Mild he wears his crown on high
Born that Frodo would not die
Born to heal the wounds of Earth
Born to give them joy and mirth
Aragorn by Arwen adored
Minas Tirith’s noble lord
Veiled as Strider no one could see
That this their king would soon be
Pleased as the Men with them to dwell
Aragorn is really swell
Hail the glorious King of all
Of Middle-earth, he shall not fall
Light and life, he does there stand
With much healing in his hands
Come and be our king forever
Never fail, oh never, never
Visit us, our noble liege
Let us ne’er be under siege
Visit us our noble liege
Let us ne’er be under siege
Hark the Herald Tall Men Sing
(Hark the Herald Angels Sing)
Hark the herald tall men sing
Glory to our brand new king!
Peace in Middle-earth so mild
Beregond is reconciled
Joyful all the people cry!
Join the triumph of the skies!
With some Elvish folk to sing
Praises ‘cause there is no Ring!
With some Rohirrim to sing
Praises ‘cause there is no Ring!
Mild he wears his crown on high
Born that Frodo would not die
Born to heal the wounds of Earth
Born to give them joy and mirth
Aragorn by Arwen adored
Minas Tirith’s noble lord
Veiled as Strider no one could see
That this their king would soon be
Pleased as the Men with them to dwell
Aragorn is really swell
Hail the glorious King of all
Of Middle-earth, he shall not fall
Light and life, he does there stand
With much healing in his hands
Come and be our king forever
Never fail, oh never, never
Visit us, our noble liege
Let us ne’er be under siege
Visit us our noble liege
Let us ne’er be under siege
- MerryK
The Twelve Days in Mordor
by Anna Estel, Arthur, Belladonnatook, Daughter of Kings, Elfriend, Erech the Undead, Lady of Light, Laiquendi, Lindorie and Primula
On my first day in Mordor, the One Ring Drew to me,
A giant Spider, fat and hungry! ...
Twelve Rings of Pow'r
Eleven fuming pits
Ten raging fires
Nine Black draped Ringwraiths
Eight Eyes-a-gawking,
Seven sneaking Smeagols,
Six drooling Orcs,
Five forged blaaaades,
Four smelly Trolls,
Three dead reflections,
Two tasty hobbits,
and a giant Spider fat and hungry!
top
Okay, it's not exactly a song, but it definitely belongs in this collection:
Based on The Night Before Christmas by Clement Clarke Moore
(A ribald rewrite for the ladies.
Mangled for your reading pleasure
by Erech the undead)
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the hole
Not a creature was stirring, not even a troll;
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that Sweet Legolas soon would be there;
The young ones were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;
A lonely Elf mother, husband killed at Helm's deep
Had just settled down for a lonely night's sleep,
When out on the verge there arose such a clatter,
She sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window she flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,
When, what to her wondering eyes came her way,
But eight tiny dwarves and a miniature sleigh,
With a tall Elven driver, so lively and fast,
She knew in a moment it must be Legolas.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
"Now, Gimli, now Bombur, now Dwalin and Balin!
On Fili, on Kili, on Nori and Thorin!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of toys, and Sweet Legolas too.
And then, in a twinkling, she heard up the chute
The prancing and dancing of each little boot.
As she drew in her hand, and was turning around,
Down the chimney Sweet Legolas came with a bound.
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;
A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a gaffer just opening his pack.
His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And his clear perfect skin was as white as the snow;
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke sweet and pungent, hung 'round like a wreath;
He had a great face and a little round booty,
That shook, when he laughed, so enticingly fruity.
He was chiseled and perfect, a right jolly young Elf,
And I wept when I saw him, in spite of myself;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I could offer my bed;
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all my longings; then stood with a jerk,
And laying his finger aside of his hose,
He gave but a nod, up my chimney he rose!
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night."
<
The Twelve Days in Mordor
by Anna Estel, Arthur, Belladonnatook, Daughter of Kings, Elfriend, Erech the Undead, Lady of Light, Laiquendi, Lindorie and Primula
On my first day in Mordor, the One Ring Drew to me,
A giant Spider, fat and hungry! ...
Twelve Rings of Pow'r
Eleven fuming pits
Ten raging fires
Nine Black draped Ringwraiths
Eight Eyes-a-gawking,
Seven sneaking Smeagols,
Six drooling Orcs,
Five forged blaaaades,
Four smelly Trolls,
Three dead reflections,
Two tasty hobbits,
and a giant Spider fat and hungry!
top
Okay, it's not exactly a song, but it definitely belongs in this collection:
Based on The Night Before Christmas by Clement Clarke Moore
(A ribald rewrite for the ladies.
Mangled for your reading pleasure
by Erech the undead)
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the hole
Not a creature was stirring, not even a troll;
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that Sweet Legolas soon would be there;
The young ones were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;
A lonely Elf mother, husband killed at Helm's deep
Had just settled down for a lonely night's sleep,
When out on the verge there arose such a clatter,
She sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window she flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,
When, what to her wondering eyes came her way,
But eight tiny dwarves and a miniature sleigh,
With a tall Elven driver, so lively and fast,
She knew in a moment it must be Legolas.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
"Now, Gimli, now Bombur, now Dwalin and Balin!
On Fili, on Kili, on Nori and Thorin!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of toys, and Sweet Legolas too.
And then, in a twinkling, she heard up the chute
The prancing and dancing of each little boot.
As she drew in her hand, and was turning around,
Down the chimney Sweet Legolas came with a bound.
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;
A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a gaffer just opening his pack.
His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And his clear perfect skin was as white as the snow;
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke sweet and pungent, hung 'round like a wreath;
He had a great face and a little round booty,
That shook, when he laughed, so enticingly fruity.
He was chiseled and perfect, a right jolly young Elf,
And I wept when I saw him, in spite of myself;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I could offer my bed;
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all my longings; then stood with a jerk,
And laying his finger aside of his hose,
He gave but a nod, up my chimney he rose!
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night."
- Erech the
Undead
The Twelve Days in Moria
by Ashlyn, Belladonna Took, Daughter of Kings, Erech the Undead, Laiquendi and Primula
On my first day in Moria, the Dwarf runes showed to me...
a squid-y thing that wants to eat me.
On my second day in Moria, the Dwarf runes showed to me...
Speak Friend and Enter
And a squid-y thing that wants to eat me...
Twelve descending stairways
Eleven Orcling Archers
Ten tons of Balrog
Nine Fellows fleeing
Eight Dwarven mummies
Seven spawn o' Sauron
Six glowing blades
Five Foolish Tooks!
Four grumpy hobbits,
Three Halls to choose from,
Speak Friend and Enter
And a squid-y thing that wants to eat me.
top
The Twelve Days in Gondor
by Belladonna Took, Daisy Gold, Daughter of Kings, Erech the Undead, Primula and Starflower
On my first day in Gondor the true King gave to me:
A flower that's from the White Tree.
On my second day in Gondor the true King gave to me:
Two pats of butter,
And a flower that's from the White Tree...
Twelve fruity puddings
Eleven lumpy gravies
Ten loaves a-baking
Nine piping pies
Eight guards a-watching
Seven small tomatoes
Six knights a flossing
Five silver wings
Four roasted birds,
Three candied yams,
Two pats of butter,
And a flower that's from the White Tree.
What a garnish! This must be Pippin's version of Gondor.
top
The Twelve Days of Afteryule
The Twelve Days in Moria
by Ashlyn, Belladonna Took, Daughter of Kings, Erech the Undead, Laiquendi and Primula
On my first day in Moria, the Dwarf runes showed to me...
a squid-y thing that wants to eat me.
On my second day in Moria, the Dwarf runes showed to me...
Speak Friend and Enter
And a squid-y thing that wants to eat me...
Twelve descending stairways
Eleven Orcling Archers
Ten tons of Balrog
Nine Fellows fleeing
Eight Dwarven mummies
Seven spawn o' Sauron
Six glowing blades
Five Foolish Tooks!
Four grumpy hobbits,
Three Halls to choose from,
Speak Friend and Enter
And a squid-y thing that wants to eat me.
top
The Twelve Days in Gondor
by Belladonna Took, Daisy Gold, Daughter of Kings, Erech the Undead, Primula and Starflower
On my first day in Gondor the true King gave to me:
A flower that's from the White Tree.
On my second day in Gondor the true King gave to me:
Two pats of butter,
And a flower that's from the White Tree...
Twelve fruity puddings
Eleven lumpy gravies
Ten loaves a-baking
Nine piping pies
Eight guards a-watching
Seven small tomatoes
Six knights a flossing
Five silver wings
Four roasted birds,
Three candied yams,
Two pats of butter,
And a flower that's from the White Tree.
What a garnish! This must be Pippin's version of Gondor.
top
The Twelve Days of Afteryule
On the first day Afteryule my true love bought to me:
An elf king in a Mallorn...
On the second day Afteryule my true love bought to me:
Two fiery Balrogs
An elf king in a Mallorn... etc. etc.
On the twelvth day Afteryule my true love bought to me:
Twelve Orcs a-drumming
Eleven men a-riding
Ten Dwarves a-mining
Nine Ents a-hooming
Eight wargs a-whining
Seven Kraken watching
Six Hobbits laughing
Five mortal rings
Four calling Gorcrows
Three Harad Mûmakil
Two fiery Balrogs
An elf king in a Mallorn
- Lady of the Laiquendi
top
<